【明報專訊】No, I didn't get into Oxford PPE. To be honest, it was what I expected, but I was nonetheless angry with myself; one reason why my philosophy interview went as badly as it did was that I didn't even finish a book I mentioned in my personal statement, and the professor based his question on it. I panicked helplessly, which didn't help. Perhaps I still wouldn't have got in had I read the book, but that way I would have been rejected knowing that I had done my best. Staring blankly at the letter, I felt like I had let everyone in my life down, my parents who have invested so much time and money in me, all the teachers who have believed in me and devoted extra time to help me and stretch me intellectually. I couldn't stop thinking obsessively about what I might have done "wrong": maybe I should have applied for modern languages, which I was much better at; maybe I should re-apply next year; maybe I shouldn't have gone to the UK at all.